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Your Life Puzzle Looks Different Than Mine

babywearing business development business self development Jan 17, 2023

If you and I were having coffee on a rainy afternoon here in NYC and talking about our lives, our many priorities would be at the top of our conversation. We would have similar but different priorities - and as my Mom would say, "DUH." 😏 That's the obvious part.

I don't know about you, but I am tired of being told how to 'make things happen' by the very people who have few - if any - of my priorities. I have a home, kids, cats, plants, one aging parent, and an aging mother-in-law. And that's not an exhaustive list, mind you.

To do any work-work stuff requires ALOT of effort.

'Batching' my work and giving my days 'themes' is nice on paper....but ummmmm, yeah. My kid broke their glasses roughhousing in my tiny galley kitchen. Now, new ones are the priority - a high, pants-on-fire priority; otherwise, they can't see. New glasses, in this case, are not optional. It doesn't matter that I planned to batch my emails or write this blog post. Nope. Glasses are a must.

This is only one example...I bet you could share several with me in under one minute.

I don't get up, get dressed, drink a cup of coffee, and go off to work and some magic elves come in and take care of everything else.

Sometimes though, I think the 'productivity gurus' have elves. My Mom pointed out the clear "Duh" moment here.

I'm the elf!

I would laugh, but UGH is what really comes out. How, then, is it that I have ever gotten anything work-related accomplished? This is the ultimate question. I am asked this almost every time I coach someone or a group. Heck, even I still ask it at times.

I heard this quote - and I have no idea who said it...maybe my mother-in-law (?) - but it stuck in my brain like a song I can't stop singing.

"Goals happen outside of the whirlwind of life."

This stuck in my brain for a few reasons, but first was this - it's not a whirlwind of life but a HURRICANE. But a whirlwind feels more manageable; maybe I should strive to make it only a whirlwind and less of a hurricane.

How do I do that? How do I find ways to make things only a whirlwind and then do the other things I want to do - you know, teach classes, create a business, run a business?

Well, for one, I don't listen to people who haven't walked in my shoes, at least to some degree. I don't listen to those who tell me I have to be able to do it all. What even is that?!

For as long as I can remember, the media told me I needed 'Calgon' to take me away and 100 arms to manage everything. Plus, it's been telling me I 'need' to be hyper-competitive and to be the best.

UGH! I reject all that.

That's not sustainable. That's not enjoying your life while on the journey. You can do that if you want. But why?

I put my whirlwind together like a puzzle. Where does this fit? What goes together? I bucked the system ages ago and have built a work-life relationship that ebbs and flows from hurricane-to-whirlwind status and back again.

It works. I get things done.

But! And this is key: I'm never doing it alone.

Are you trying too? If so, again, I ask, Why?

I have incredible support around me. People who walk the path I do - or did. Find your people. I'm happy to be your people or a part of them anyway. Try what it's like to have at least one time a week where people understand your whirlwind (or is it a hurricane?) and make progress on your terms.