Carrying Across Generations: Supporting the Bodies of Alternate Caregivers (Part 2)

Post Two in a Three-Part Series for Babywearing Educators

A baby’s growth is a beautiful kind of acceleration. A newborn who melts into the crook of a grandparent’s elbow may, just a few weeks later, feel surprisingly hefty and wiggly. Parents adapt gradually as days blur into nights, but alternate caregivers often meet a new version of the baby each visit: bigger, more alert, more intent on movement.

This shift can be joyous. It can also be uncomfortable.

For many grandparents and part-time caregivers, their desire to hold the baby outpaces their physical endurance. Arthritis, decreased core strength, joint instability, recovery from past injuries and surgeries…bodies carry histories. Without thought and intention, the experience that should feel connected can instead feel risky, exhausting, or worse, discouraging.

Babywearing can change that trajectory entirely, but only when we teach it through the lens of ability, not through one-carrier-fits-all assumptions.

The honest truth about aging and holding

A caregiver may hesitate to admit discomfort, especially if they’re proud of their role or fear being perceived as incapable and then removed from baby care. They may compensate in subtle ways that strain their back or shoulders, or grip more tightly than needed, straining their hands and wrists. A short hold becomes taxing. A wiggly baby prompts anxiety. What should be connection is interrupted by pain.

As educators, we become preventers of injury and protectors of dignity, especially in moments like these. A baby carrier should distribute weight across stronger muscle groups, support alignment, and free the arms to adjust gently rather than brace. More than convenience, babywearing can be the difference between sustainable caring and withdrawn participation.

Comfort is not just physical, it’s also emotional

When a grandparent feels physically confident, they’re able to stay mentally present with the baby. They can delight, sway, hum, and explore without the distraction of fatigue. They can celebrate the baby’s growth and changes rather than simply enduring them.

And for the baby, the benefits are profound. Studies on infant physiology show that babywearing helps regulate heart rate and breathing patterns, reduces cortisol (the stress hormone), and supports vestibular development, the system that governs balance and spatial awareness. Even brief periods of being upright and held close contribute to bone and muscle development in ways that in-arm holding can’t always sustain.

Oxytocin rises in both bodies, nurturing attachment and buffering stress - a biological invitation to more of these moments.

The caregiver receives a hormonal reward, too. Oxytocin rises in both bodies, nurturing attachment and buffering stress - a biological invitation to more of these moments.

When sharing carriers isn’t the right solution

The parents’ favorite carriers may not work well for others. Torso length, shoulder breadth, mobility limitations… these can transform a well-loved carrier into a frustrating puzzle. A part-time caregiver often needs carriers that are intuitive (to them), supportive (for them), and with fewer steps to remember.

Encouraging them to choose a carrier of their own, ideally introduced while expecting baby, allows them to practice at a pace that builds ease. It also signals that their care matters enough to deserve tools tailored to them.

This is not indulgent. It is injury prevention, confidence-building, and relationship-strengthening, all bundled together.

Teaching in partnership with the parents

Sometimes parents assume their carriers will simply be shared, or that their carrying style should be precisely replicated. Aligning expectations early within the family prevents tension later. A consultation that includes both the parents and the alternate caregivers creates space to discuss comfort differences, physical limitations, and any lingering fear of “doing it wrong.”

Everyone literally gets on the same page with the same language. The parent sees their support network becoming skilled. The caregiver sees that their involvement is welcomed and valued. And the baby will have one seamless experience of how they are cared for.

When a grandparent learns to babywear, they aren’t just learning a new skill. They’re participating in the parents’ values and rhythm of care. It’s an act of respect and belonging, a way of saying, “I see what matters to you, and I want to support it.”

As educators, we can help nurture that perspective by framing babywearing as collaborative care.

Information doesn’t mean persuasion; it means empowerment. Start small, let confidence build, and help caregivers see what’s possible for them. One or two carriers that fit their comfort level are often all they need to succeed. Honor what they tell you, rather than rushing to share what you know or have experienced.

Remember: the goal isn’t to make everyone a babywearing enthusiast. Even a caregiver who chooses not to babywear may be impacted by what they learn from you about the baby’s expectations, needs, personality, or favorite carrying position. Babywearing often only happens for short periods throughout the day - and for alternate caregivers, maybe even less. But the relationship and understanding they build of and with this child will impact so much more.

Your expertise keeps generations connected

When we invite alternate caregivers into our learning space and treat them as active, important participants rather than occasional helpers, we reinforce the family and child’s entire attachment system. A baby who feels safely held by many grows into a human who trusts the world more easily.

Your teaching offers:

• Strength where there would be strain
• Ease where there would be uncertainty
• Belonging where there would be hesitation

Babywearing becomes the bridge across generations, holding bodies, hearts, and relationships secure.